MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL WHO IS THE HAPPIEST OF THEM ALL?

"I Like the way it hurts", she whispered to him softly.

When cold invades the place, everyone breaks up and hooks up again for spending the winter cozy by the fireplace with their partner. But are they really in love?

I’ve come to realize that men often remain in a relationship out of pity or boredom. Women on the other hand remain in it out of habit, to boost up their confidence or have someone to nag at night. And then, they both are caught up in the whole social pressure that ends up being nothing but a superficial love life.

They may not talk anymore and may have drifted apart and forgotten the meaning of the “I love you” phrase.  In the world we live, each one of us is so confused with our ego, we forgets there is someone close by that is waiting with his / her arms open to save him / her. And that someone is not always the person you are socially and emotionally associated too. If you are lucky, it may be and in that case you don’t have to look for him / her.

Couples get used to having sex; Love and passion and all those popping hearts around you two will eventually go away. And what remains? Respect, most importantly. When looking for your soul mate, you are looking for the one who will hold your hair when throwing up, squeeze your hand when hurting, kiss you softly letting you know tomorrow will be a better day, the one who will bear your baby. A life partner should know where you come from, how you have been raised; He should never dare verbally or physically violate you. If he does and yet you see the good in him, either make him a better man or change countries.

23.6% of Greek women declare that she knows  a woman from their related and/or friendly environment that it has suffered or is suffering from incidents of domestic violence from the spouse/intimate partners

In theory, we all know that. We all believe that respect within a couple is important, essential and vital (three words that mean the same, but repetition won’t hurt) but what happens when our theory and practice start growing apart? That is, when you know you are seeking respect, but remain with someone who doesn’t give you any.  

I don’t know. Really, I don’t know. A friend of mine went to Guadeloupe for six months to get over his break up with his fiancé after she cheated on him. Another one is seeing a psychotherapist for over two years now. Others lock themselves up until they feel they can love again. There are other extreme cases where people (mostly women) attempt to end their life. It depends on the strength we have and most importantly, on how much we know about emotional competence.

Beautiful women tend to fall madly in love with weird, ugly, scary and socially awkward men. This, I don’t get it. I know the feeling, I have done it too long time ago, but I still don’t get it. A woman may have everything to feel comfortable in her skin and mind (i.e.: financial support, a career, a home, family, friends, etc.) and yet, she feels the need to be loved by this ONE man that has proven he is not the actual ONE; But she believes he is helping her with her confidence boost.

Masses tend to label us according to the way we see ourselves; The stronger we feel the more they respect us

It’s a cruel world out there and human relationships are becoming harder. You never know who to trust, who is your friend and who is taking advantage of you. So when it comes to romance, it is even harder. And the only people you can turn to are your friends, the ones you have known since school and that have confirmed they are truly awesome. Even so, when it comes to choose between the boyfriend and the friends, we often go with our emotional instincts and pick the boyfriend.

We women must start to play it a bit smarter and put some boundaries on what is asked by our dear man or future lover. It’s all about education. Start cutting yourself some slack, feel the power invested in you and act out. If he leaves, he never was there; if he stays, he will be the father of your child.

Imagine you are in the situation where all the bad things of a relationship happened to you: He acted like a jerk and you are now coping with the betrayal, the violence or anything else he might have done. First and foremost, I will start by the cheesy: “You live and you learn”. Next time it won’t happen, you would have pulled the trigger before he opens his mouth.

YOUR Happiness is what makes you wake up in the morning with a smile.

In order to learn, you must first leave. Get rid of the old ruins and start building a palace of your own. You probably won’t miss him; you will miss the person you thought he was.

La crainte du danger est mille fois plus terrifiante que le danger present (Daniel Defoe in Robinson Crusoe)
The fear of danger is a thousand times more terrifying then the danger itself.

You have to understand that by losing this one man, one love or one whatever-it-was-you-had, you are gaining a new social life, more time with your friends, more time with your own self and most importantly the chance to meet a person worth your time with a whole new dimension to it.

ONE is a lonely number; but at least, you are on top.

Cheer up. Really, stay positive and think further about every situation you are in. If I were to give one word of advice: Drink to all those nights that turned to mornings and all those friends that turned to family; it will probably keep the darkness away for a bit.

Friends are like angels: you don't have to see them to know they will prevent you from falling.